Humour.


The jokes presented on this page are intended solely for entertainment purposes and are not meant to offend or harm any individuals or groups. I believe in promoting humor that is light-hearted, inclusive, and respectful of diverse perspectives. While I strive to ensure that my content remains within the boundaries of good taste, I acknowledge that humor is subjective, and what one person finds amusing, another may not.

If any of the jokes featured on this page inadvertently cause offense, please accept my sincere apologies. My intention is to bring smiles, laughter, and joy to my readers, and I encourage feedback that helps me improve my content and ensure it remains enjoyable for everyone.

I respect and value the principles of inclusivity, tolerance, and sensitivity, and I am committed to refining my content accordingly. Thank you for visiting my page and for understanding the spirit in which my jokes are shared.

Remember, humor is a wonderful way to bring people together and brighten our days. Let’s laugh together and spread positivity!

All jokes mentioned are completely unoriginal and merely reproduced. The author does not intend to harm, denigrate or downplay the severity and importance of historical events, persons and the like. All jokes are to be taken as exactly that - pieces of humour.

  • How many SDEs does it take to change a light bulb?
    None. It’s a hardware problem.

  • My computer caught a virus yesterday.
    It now has a terminal illness.

  • An SQL statement walked into a bar and saw my crush and I sitting at two tables.
    It approached us and asked “may I join you?” (and that kids, is how I met your mother)

  • Ever wondered how good I am with PowerPoint?
    You could definitely say that I Excel at it.

  • Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

  • I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.

  • Why did the it hurt when I threw tomatoes at my friend?
    The tomatoes were still in a can. (This joke still haunts me)

  • God created war so that Americans could learn geography.

  • What’s the difference between Americans and a computer?
    Americans don’t have troubleshooting

  • I never believed faith could move mountains,
    but then I saw what it did to skyscrapers

  • Did you know princess diana had dandruff?
    Yeah they found her head and shoulders on the dashboard.

  • A santa at nasa backwards is a santa at nasa, racecar backwards is racecar but racecar sidewards is how Paul walker died.

  • I tried to eat a clock once
    It was very time consuming

  • Did you know Trump was gonna ban shredded cheese?
    He wanted to make America grate again.

  • My friend Simba was moving too slow,
    so I asked him to Mu-fasah

  • Did you hear Forrest Gump’s email got hacked?
    Turns out his password was 1forrest1

  • What’s the difference between Batman and Black Panther?
    Batman returns

  • What does DNA stand for?
    National Dyslexia Association.

  • A friend who’s in liquor production, Has a still of astounding construction, The alcohol boils, Through old magnet coils, He says that it’s proof by induction.

  • I couldn’t find the Cybersecurity team all day.
    All I know is that they ran-some-where

My favourite science joke.

Heisenberg and Schrödinger get pulled over for speeding. The cop asks Heisenberg “Do you know how fast you were going?” Heisenberg replies, “No, but we know exactly where we are!” The officer looks at him confused and says “you were going 108 miles per hour!” Heisenberg throws his arms up and cries, “Great! Now we’re lost!” The officer looks over the car and asks Schrödinger if the two men have anything in the trunk. “A cat,” Schrödinger replies. The cop opens the trunk and yells “Hey! This cat is dead.” Schrödinger angrily replies, “Well he is now stupid.”

A tale of broken connections.

We 302 each other when we were young.
Our love was 403, we were just stupid kids in love.
She was 423 into my heart the moment I see her.
I knew I couldn’t 303.
Then her father decided to move to another city,
I made 429 to him, asking, begging them to stay.
But they were 501…
I even offered him all my money
And my new cable
But he said it was 406.

One day after school I went to see her, but they were 404.
I was young and naive, I didn’t know I had 300
After 102 this falling apart,
I accepted the fact that they 301 and she was 410
And I knew it was 425 for me to get attached anyway
But I can’t help it, I still have this 409 in me.
Afterall, it’s not like 418, I have feelings
Even though my 417, 226 to it now.

Author : 451